014. Letting Life Move Through You: Releasing Control & Returning to Presence
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Hello and welcome back to Return to Rhythm. Let's just take a moment to arrive here together. Just soften your body a little, take a deep breath, in through your nose and out through your mouth,
let yourself fully land in this space.[00:01:00]
There's something that has been coming through really clearly right now, and it feels very present in the collective, and it's this tension between trying to control life and actually letting life move through you. What I'm noticing is that a lot of us are saying we want flow. We want it to feel easy.
We want to feel connected and deeply present in our lives, but underneath all of this belief that we can live life that way, there's still something that is holding us back and it's gripping us and keeping us from moving. And what that is, is the attachment to outcomes and constantly looking for something that needs to be fixed, which is a [00:02:00] subtle way that we are trying to still control how things are going in our lives.
We are attached to how things are supposed to go and what the outcomes should look like. And. Constantly needing something to resolve or to land or to make sense. And when that doesn't happen, we get pulled and that tends to pull us into the mind, into overthinking, into trying to just figure it out.
And what does that actually mean? What does that look like?
It means that we're not fully in the experience anymore. We're rewatching it. We're analyzing it. We're trying to control it, but we're not actually being fully present in whatever is [00:03:00] showing up for us in the moment.
What does it look like to let life flow through you? What does it mean to let life flow through you?
It looks like being inside the moment without needing to define it while it's happening. It looks like feeling something fully without immediately trying to change it. It looks like allowing an experience to unfold without constantly checking to see where it's going, because the moment we're attaching to an outcome, we're leaving the present.
We start measuring the experience instead of living it. And this is where I see so many people getting stuck because when something unexpected happens or something feels challenging, it doesn't just stay in the moment, it turns into a spiral. And let me break [00:04:00] down what this actually looks like. Say something unexpected happens and your mind activates your nervous system is turning on your fight or flight, and it's trying to analyze, is this dangerous?
Did I do something wrong? What does this mean? Did I mess this up? And this leads us into overthinking. It leads us into an emotional spiral downward. It leads us to disconnecting from our inner being and disconnection from ourselves and the experience that we've just moved through.
And now, instead of just being in this disruption in this event that we've experienced. We're actually just in the story about it, and that story pulls you further away from [00:05:00] yourself.
Recently, I have definitely experienced something where I got stuck in the spiral. I took a trip to LA to visit a new friend, and it was the most intense experience that I've had in a very long time. And there were definite moments from the first night that left me unable to sleep. That left me stuck in a spiral in my head full of the what ifs, full of the worst case scenarios. But the more I allowed myself to just feel it and be in it, and be in the tension, and allowing myself to see this moment as the portal of expansion that my inner voice told me that it would be.
It started to soften [00:06:00] and my channel opened more fully and I was more present, and I was able to fully enjoy the experience with my friend in a new place. To be outdoors, to taste new food, to drink new coffee, to be so. Deeply present in those moments and I reignited parts of myself that I felt like I had to turn off for a really long time.
Parts of myself that told me that I didn't deserve to experience joy, to have new experiences, to fully pour into myself. I allowed those stories to run my life unconsciously. They were in the background telling me that I didn't deserve the joy, that I didn't deserve to travel, that I hadn't earned the right to [00:07:00] fully be present and joyful in my life.
There were moments of joy. There were moments where I got hints of it, but I had to step outside of my comfort zone, outside of my everyday routines and really understand that there was so much more available to me if I decided to unhook from these stories and these beliefs that my mind would keep on rotation.
I recognized that I didn't need to fix anything within myself. I just needed to let go and fully be present in the experience so it could show me what I needed to learn by being in that place. In that moment, my inner voice drove the [00:08:00] entire trip. It took me to that specific place at that specific time for a very specific reason.
And can we be fully present in our life to allow those opportunities to show themselves to us? Because if we're not willing to do that, then we're cutting ourself off from so much in life and so many things that life wants to show us.
So many experiences it wants us to have.
It wants us to have a life filled with wonder, with joy, with love, with presence, to fully be immersed in it, but we're so conditioned to believe that we have to fix things and solve things. Problem solving is so deeply rooted into our [00:09:00] conditioning and our society and being brought up in school. We are constantly scanning for problems to solve rather than fully being in our lives, but we don't need to do that. The problem and the solution are on two different frequencies. They exist on two different frequencies. So how can we ever fully land on the solution if our tuning device within our body is constantly searching for the problem, we have to disconnect from those energies, those frequencies break up the routine, interrupt the pattern so that we can experience these shifts in real time.
What if we can take these moments and reframe them? What if we can look at them, these big events? What if [00:10:00] this moment, this disruption that we are perceiving is just something to experience and not something to solve.
What if this moment you're in is not something to solve? It's just something that you need to be in.
And this is where perception becomes everything. Because the same experience can feel completely different depending on how you're relating to it. A disruption can feel like something's off, this isn't working, I need to fix this. Or it can feel like something is shifting. Something is opening. Something is asking me to see this differently. And that shift from resistance to openness and from control to curiosity is what brings you back into your body and back into your [00:11:00] life.
When you actually start to view challenges and disruptions in this way, you start to see them as expansion, and you don't get pulled under by them. You move with them. You let them show you something, you let them change you, and that's where life starts to feel different. It's not because everything is perfect, but because you're no longer fighting what's happening.
You're in it. You're feeling it. You're allowing it to move through you. Instead of getting stuck inside it. Stuck inside the story, stuck inside the mind spiral, stuck inside trying to control the outcome, and I think this is one of the most powerful things to remember. Perception is not just how you think about your life, it's how you're actually experiencing it. [00:12:00] It's the lens that either keeps you in contraction or it opens you back into joy, into presence and into love. So if you notice yourself spiraling or overthinking, or trying to control where something is going, just pause and ask yourself, am I inside this moment or am I trying to get out of it?
And what would it feel like just to be here for a second to feel it without needing it to be anything else? Because that's where your rhythm is, that's where your connection is, and that's where life actually meets you. And the more you allow yourself to be there, the more things begin to shift naturally.
Not because you forced them to, but because you stopped resisting what was already unfolding.
And if this is something you've been feeling, this pull to come back into your life, into your [00:13:00] body, into your presence, this is something that we're going to be moving through together inside my new program called Wonderfull. Not by thinking about it, but by actually experiencing it. By creating small moments where you can feel this shift in real time so that if you feel that pull, you'll know and you can step into that space whenever it feels right. For now, just stay here for a moment. Feel your body, feel your breath, and let yourself come back. I'll see you in the next one.
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