005. She Was Never My Name: A Sacred Reclamation

# 005. Return to Rhythm – She Was Never My Name: A Sacred Reclamation

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Welcome to Return to Rhythm, A sacred space for the woman who's been holding it all, but somewhere along the way stopped hearing herself. This is your invitation back into the quiet, back into your breath, back into the parts of you that never needed to prove, perform, or hold it all together. I'm Farrah Channel Inner Voice facilitator and emotional liberation guide.

I hold space for high functioning heart led women who've lost themselves in the giving to soften, to unravel, and to remember the truth buried beneath the busyness. Here we slow down, we ask better questions, we listen inward, and we begin again, not from pressure, but from presence. Each week you'll receive channeled meditations, truth transmissions, or sacred reflections designed to help you return [00:01:00] to your rhythm and rise in your own divine timing.

There's no rush here. There's just your truth waiting to be heard. Let's begin.

Hello and welcome back to Return to Rhythm. I'm so glad to have you here with me today. And if you're a new listener, welcome to the show. Today I want to share a personal story with you, one that is very near and dear to my heart and has really. It impacted my life a lot in the last year or so, and I'm excited to really bring this forward.

I know there are people that are in my immediate circle that are probably curious about it and [00:02:00] how it came about. I did write a Substack article about it in the initial moment, but this is just from my heart to share it with you. About a year ago, I decided to change my name. And this is how it happened.

I was going through inner voice facilitator training back in early 2023, and while I was deep in that, I started to do these gratitude meditations. At night they were a gratitude body scan. As I was doing that one night, I kept hearing the word name from my inner voice.

I just kept saying Name, name, name. And I'm like, okay, what is this? What do you want me to know about Name? And it said the name, Farrah. And then it said [00:03:00] the name Lee. And I'm like, okay, well is my name, not my name? Is that my name? And it was basically like, yes, this is like, your name is Farrah Lee. There, there is no other name for you.

And ever since I heard that name, every time I would journal with my inner voice. Every time I would go inward. My spirit guides, my inner voice would always use the name Farrah. They never once called me, Jackie, Jacqueline, Jacqueline Marie, whatever my birth name was, it was never once said from the other side, from my inner voice, from the divine.

The only name I have ever heard was Farrah and for nearly a year, I kept my name the same. I kept going by [00:04:00] Jackie, and it got to a point later on where anytime I heard that name, it would literally make my body tense up. I would feel so uncomfortable in my body.

When I heard Jackie, it was like, that is not my name anymore. It's not. It's just not me. And it was really hard to live according to my inner voice and follow my inner voice when my physical reality and the spiritual side were almost like butting heads. It was like there was just this contradiction going on within.

And I had to make the decision and I haven't legally changed my name. I haven't gone through that process yet because I know it's going to be, so much physical 3D World paper [00:05:00] that I just don't wanna deal with right now. But I knew it was gonna be perceived as weird, strange is she going through a midlife crisis?

I knew that there was going to be a lot of judgment cast upon me, but I had to make the choice that I have to live according to what feels good and true to me in my body versus what everyone else's perception of me is. If it doesn't feel good in my body, why would I wanna spend the rest of my life hearing a name that doesn't resonate all the way down to my bones?

If it makes me uncomfortable to hear the other name, why should I live my life that way?

Had I been still in my people pleasing era, I am pretty sure I would've just continued to suffer through it and deal [00:06:00] with it, and, not embody my truth, but I have to speak up. I have to say no. My name is Farrah. Now

it is really interesting because for as long as I can remember, my name has just felt weird to me. I just don't feel like my name fit me for most of my life, and now it makes so much sense to me why it never did because all along that was not my name. The interesting thing too, that like once I had heard it from my inner voice.

I immediately looked it up because when I heard it, just tears just started pouring down my face. It was this complete and total knowing in my body that it was true, and when I looked up the meaning of each name, it means joy, healer. [00:07:00] And that was just so resonant for me. The name has deep meaning and it feels so true because I know that I'm a healer and I know that I'm here to spread joy.

I'm here to show what it looks like to follow the joy versus living in the struggle and the. Difficulty of life. I'm here to be the example, and I do that by following my joy, by following where my inner voice is leading me, by using my gifts for good.

Recently I've come to more of an understanding of it wasn't a name that was given to me

I think that that's always just been my name [00:08:00] and I was just remembering it.

I really felt that deeply when I was meditating the other day and I was like, whoa, I am just remembering who I am from. My initial inception, I'm sure from the initial creation of my soul, I think I've always been Farrah Lee,

and I'm just coming back home to that and I've done enough unearthing of all of the things that were not me, to the point where I could actually know who I truly am all the way down to my core.

And I just love that so much. I love knowing that we can remember who we are, that everything that has been put on us doesn't mean that's who we [00:09:00] are.

I think it's really important for us to decide who we're going to live our life for, and yes, it's just a name, but to me that name is so resonant and so important to me, and I don't think people can truly understand that until you have connected with that soul aspect of yourself. And that's what I'm here to do, is to help people reawaken that part of themselves, to remember that part of themselves and come home to it.

Because there's just so much for you when you go in that direction, when you go towards living a heart led life versus living from your mind, living from logic, living from the way everyone else is doing everything.

It's a more deeply connected way of being,

there's just so much more [00:10:00] depth.

It's really opened me up to so many new experiences this year. And really, I thought I was ready to do this work, over a year ago, but I think the name change was really a fire starter, if you will. It was igniting an even deeper path to go on. I know that I had cleared out a lot of the things that were right on the surface, but.

Changing my name was like taking a step down. If you're willing to go to this place and say yes to changing your name, you're willing to go all the way down, all the way into the parts that you don't wanna look at all the way into your shadow and face everything. Because a name is so important to a lot of people and.

It's such a big part of your ego [00:11:00] identity that if I'm willing to disrupt that part of me, I'm willing to disrupt all of the things that I have within me that are not my truth.

I unearth so much, ancestral, so much past life, so much. Ugh. Just so much came to the surface this year that it was really, really such a transformative time for me, and I'm so grateful because I feel so at home within myself, and so many people have come to me and said that being around me feels like home.

And that's because I feel like home within me. I'm able to show people and be that for people. Because I have done this work,

and I just want you to know that [00:12:00] if you do the work, it ripples out. It affects everybody in your immediate life. Because when you change, you show that it's okay for others to change too. It's okay for you to let go and be more of who you are, rather than wearing the mask and people pleasing and placating to everyone around you.

It's okay to let go of that. It's safe to let go of that. I haven't been punished for changing my name. I haven't. Been crucified for it. I'm sure there's whispers behind my back, whatever, but that doesn't matter to me. It's not gonna change the way I live my life. If someone wants to talk about me, I don't worry about what other people think of me because I love me just as I am.

I love me for following [00:13:00] this part of me so deeply and listening to it. Because I feel so much more connected. I feel connected to everything.

It's just such a cool experience to be able to do this work, and I love it so much. I love holding space for people. I love allowing people to truly feel and let go and. Recognize how powerful they are within.

Do not discount how powerful you are and how much you can change your life just by making different choices.

It is also awakened something within me as well, that I am going to make a [00:14:00] audio series that's gonna be a mini series for sale for, reawakening the desires of the mother. Because I've had this realization that when we become a mother, there's so much emphasis on. Oh, we get to name the child and what do I want the child to be?

Do I want it to be a boy or a girl? It's so much about us as the person having the child versus the new soul that is coming in. It's about how am I gonna address them? How am I gonna name them? How am I going to. Shape this person to be how I believe they should be, rather than allowing them to be who they are when they come in.

Because the kids that are coming in, remember who they are. They have deep wells of wisdom within them. They are so much more close to source and [00:15:00] they can see what's broken and know what needs to be changed to usher in the new paradigm. And we have to be able to step back and allow them to do that.

And how do we do that? We have to reawaken the desires that live within us. We have to reawaken our sovereignty. We have to come back to our own personal truth and stand in our truth so we can show the children that it's okay for them to do that as well. And for whatever reason, my name felt like a good anchor point for that because the name that my parents chose for me was not my name.

I had to come to the realization no, that's not actually how I would like to be called upon. That is not what feels true in my body. And how can we allow the kids that are coming in now to stand in their truth to what feels true [00:16:00] to them in their body, and what their desires are and what their needs are as far as how can we foster them to be what they came here to be?

We all come here with a mission of what we're supposed to do in this lifetime that we've agreed to before we've entered this physical reality. So how can we best support those kids in that way rather than forcing them to conform to all of these ideals and beliefs that have been thrust upon us that we feel like we have to keep reinforcing.

I just want to be the example for people that it's okay to be who you are regardless if someone else is judging you or perceiving what you're doing as not okay. That's just their own wounds. That's their own shadow that they're not willing to face if they're casting judgment [00:17:00] upon you for the choices that you're making in your life.

If you're ready to stop living your life for other people, if you're ready to stop people pleasing and placating and being the peacekeeper, and you want to actually go into your own inner voice and uncover what desires live within you and find out who you truly are underneath all of the conditioning and.

Limiting beliefs and stories and narratives that you are living out in your current reality. If you're ready for that, if you're ready to go inward, reclaim is going to be for you. It's going to help you learn your true yes and no from your body and start to live from your truth rather than how everyone else perceives you to be.

If you are interested, the wait list is still open. You can join at any time and [00:18:00] I would love to have you and welcome you in. Also reawakening. Desires of the mother will be available soon. I'm not sure what I'm gonna call it yet. It's going to be a three part audio series that you'll be able to purchase and it will always be available for you to get whenever you feel called.

I will keep you posted when that is available. You are welcome to follow me on Instagram, TikTok YouTube. I post, I would say very randomly whenever I feel called to post. So just be on the lookout there. I would probably announce it on one of those places first to let you know when it's available for you.

I believe that's all I have as far as ways you can work with me right now other than booking a inner voice session. Those are always available. I also do packages of those as well if you are interested. It really helps to go into the [00:19:00] inner voice consistently over a period of time to stay anchored into that place and. They're just my favorite sessions to do with people. So if you are interested, just let me know and I'll see you in the next one.